Friday, October 24, 2014


I am so thankful for 2nd, 3rd 4th chances and more.  The journey of a healthy lifestyle is a very hard thing to stay on track of for me it seems.  I have had so many ups and downs in the past 4 years since I had my Lap-Band procedure in October 2010.  It does not seem like it has been that long!! During that time I have switched jobs, my kids have gotten a lot more active so we are on the road a lot, I have had two surgeries for a break in my foot, and just life… is hard!  When I write, I write for myself and as you know I make myself very vulnerable, I choose to share my feelings in hopes that I can inspire others.   I have recently started communicating with someone who has also had lap-band surgery and was frankly at a stand-still and frankly very frustrated.  I had a couple of great conversations with her and she has expressed how I have inspired her so much and she feels like she has hope now.  Well I shared that with Tony my husband and cried as I told him.  How can I inspire anyone when I can’t seem to inspire myself to try to be positive and get back on track to a healthy life-style?  Last week I had a moment where I threw my hands up in the air and said I need help.  Tony and I had a couple of tearful talks and I decided that I was going to start on making baby steps to head back on the track to a healthy lifestyle. 

Monday morning came and I stepped on the scale, now mind you, I know I have been gaining and frankly not happy about it.  Monday I stepped on, looked down and nearly cried.  What had I allowed to happen in the last year and a half since my fracture in my foot???  Well no exercise, depression, two foot surgery one that put a plate and 4 screws in my foot and then one to remove them has caused me to get off of track.  I am not using my foot injury as the only liable culprit in this weight gain but when you take away the opportunity to walk/run on a treadmill since April of 2013 and then all the drama that has gone with the injury, surgeries and time to rehab I became an emotional mess, and chocolate and such seemed to be my fix L. 

Monday after I got off of the scale I proceeded to do as planned, I went to the kitchen took my meds and vitamins and then proceeded to make 2 protein shakes.  I have had a protein shake each morning, and one at lunch and then trying to eat a sensible meal at night.  Night time is when it is hard for me.  I am trying to stay as normal as possible but yet not get to overboard like I have in the past.  Tony took me last night to DQ for a treat and a part of me panicked.  What was I going to have…..well I had a smoothie, probably not the best but it was not my usually tuxedo chocolate blizzard. 

I am looking forward to getting back on track and seeing how I can be successful again and get healthy again.  I had my stitches out of my foot the other day and I am feeling better but not great yet.  I am eager to get back on my treadmill but I know that I need to take a few more weeks to let my foot heal for good this time.  In the mean-time I am going to work on me.  I am going to try to eat sensibly, try to be positive, make small changes and look forwards not backwards.  I look forward to setting new goals and achieving them.  Most importantly this time I am going to be more realistic and enjoy the journey and quit worrying about the finish-line.  I have a magic number again but if I inch my way back to that number in a healthy way…..that is all that matters, even if I don’t hit it.  Feel free to join me on my journey, encourage me, and hold me accountable.  Also feel free to share my journey.  I am not an expert about Lap-Band but I am not ashamed to say I have a Lap-Band and I have had some mountains and valleys with it.  I am more than willing to talk to anyone who has questions or might just need to be inspired.  Thank you and God Bless You!  Jane